Teaching consequences, it's never too early. (12/16-12/22)

Hello and good day my peeps, so here we are another week is back upon us and I just want to take a quick moment to say hello and acknowledge all those that keep up with all the things we are up to here at Chi-Native. There never seems to be a lack for content to speak on especially these days whether we are speaking on politics, mental health or child rearing. That last part brings me to my topic for this week and that would be parenting choices in regards to teaching children actions and consequences. That said I have seen specific post more recently made by parents that seem to state things like the following: I won't discipline my kids because they are over rambunctious at a party, I won't discipline my kids because they are over stimulated and are acting out because of the stimuli around them, or I won't make my kids be nice to you because they don't necessarily know you. It isn't just these statements that I have witnessed but more the behaviors I have seen while out in public more and more and the lack of consequences given to children while out for their actions. Example: I am at a grocery store there is a kid running up and down an aisle just screaming like a maniac while the mother isn't paying this kid any attention but there is also a wet sign on the floor. As you can imagine what is to come, this kid survives the first attempt at running up and down the aisle but wipes out big time the second attempt. Not once did this mother attempt to tell her son, hey stop running you will fall and might hurt yourself, not once did she divert her attention to him and talk to this kid to address his behavior, not once did she bother to speak to this kid about what was wrong. Needless to say now the kid is full on screaming and now the mom is omg, the kid has a busted lip, the mom is screaming for a manager and when someone arrives shes blaming the store, questioning why the floor is wet, she wants an ambulance, she needs to file a claim. I mean it was ridiculous, she didn't once mention what really happened, she didn't once explain to her son what he did wrong once he calmed himself down (this kid was 7 years old, so this wasn't a walking toddler or baby guys) I just want to know when did so many adults begin to think that they don't need to teach their children discipline, respect, manners? When did so many adults decide that children do not need to learn and understand that every action has a consequence? Folks wonder why their children won't listen to them, why their children are constantly getting in trouble at school because they won't listen or sit still. Children should not be allowed to do as they please, nor should they be allowed to act as they please and it doesn't matter in what scenario we are talking about either because you just can't do as you please in a modern society, as adults we don't get to just do as we want all the time and say what we want on a day to day basis, we have consequences for our actions. Tantrums for instance, why do so many folks just allow a child to go insane whether in a restaurant or at a shop, it is crazy to me that any parent just ignores the cries and attempts for attention while those around have to listen to those high pitched wails and screams. A parent needs to gather their own child and go somewhere else and deal with what is ailing their child and not just ignoring them while out and about in public. Parents when your child is in someone else's home or at someone else's event and they are jumping all over the furniture, breaking stuff, opening doors and going from room to room which is not inside their home you most certainly need to grab your child and address the behavior and correct it and if your unwilling to tell your child they can not do as they please in a place that is not their home then I would quickly be asking you and your child to leave because I do not have to allow for their lack of discipline and boundaries within my own home. It is vital to understand lack of parenting in the early years turn into bad teen years again resulting from bad parenting and at this point there is no resolve on how to address your adolescent teens behavior because you lost your hold on authority early on in their development. Exploring next the notion that you don't have to make your child be nice to those they do not know, being nice doesn't mean being naive but it does promote patience and awareness of your self and expressions you give. I can't understand why any parent doesn't think a child should know what being nice is, even when one does not want to, I mean we all have bosses and we all don't like our bosses but we do know how to be appropriate and nice in not just behaviors but in speaking and reacting to them because if we did not and we didn't engage accordingly we wouldn't have that job that is required in order to continue to provide a roof over our heads or food on the table. Hey I know no parent wants to be told how to parent, but there is so much more to be said for the type of parents that allow these behaviors and say nothing to address them. We can not allow children to think the world revolves around them because it does not, we can not allow children to do as they please just because they are children, these are adults in the making and they require lessons and teachings, not to simply be left to act out atrociously and nothing be done to teach them about carrying themselves appropriately when out in the world that will not cater to them. We have to raise our children to be self reliant, to be aware, to be sufficient, to be accountable and strong when the storms are hard, how can one learn these things when they are constantly allowed to be childish? Again these are adults in the making and it is our job as parents to aid them in growing to understand we all can make whatever choices we want however every choice has a consequence whether good or bad and each individual must face those consequences. People tend to forget that every day as your child grows so does their world of awareness and if we don't start teaching these young children fundamental skills early on we fail them as they age into adulthood hence what you see more and more today, young adults still acting like children whining about why me and life is unfair instead of rationalizing their own actions had consequences leading them to their current situation. I am aware many won't or don't agree with how I view child raising, I believe in discipline and if that has to also include some spanking after we have discussed your behavior, done the timeout, done the grounding, then so be it, because in the end sometimes that spanking was just what was needed because that bad behavior ceases to exist. (Now I do not condone child abuse - so STOP there, but if a little spanking is needed to their thigh/bum then so be it, I grew up in the era as well as my parents as well as my own son where spanking happened as a last resort after we spoke and tried all other outlets to explore the bad behavior and guess what we all turned out just fine, most importantly we all know and understand actions have consequences) Until next time folks, it's just me out here speaking on what I see, expressing my views and hopefully someone can relate to what I am saying along the way. We are all trying to do our best, but children require more than just our best, they require everything we got and being a parent isn't always easy, children aren't always easy but neither is life. Till next week, may you all walk through your days with your head held high, proud of who you are, and an awareness that you matter always. xoxo. #ThisIsMyBlog #ThrowEmC #Tantrums #WildChild #OhMy #Discipline #GotSome #ChiNative #Blogger 

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